Anxiety Dreams

Have you started having anxiety dreams about the race? Last night I dreamt that race day had arrived and I had forgotten to distribute the shirts. Doi.

Currently waiting for our building's water service to resume so that I can shower off the sweat from this morning's treadmill run. My knee is achy. I am stinky.

so i love this new exercise machine at the club... it is a cross between a treadmill, stair stepper and elliptical! i cant wait to go back today to jump on it for awhile, since i am not going to go out in the rain to run.
im telling you, i am going to be in the best shape by the time i turn 40!
feeling inspired.

No new insight here--just a reminder that our race is less than 3 weeks away!

5.42 mile run this morning and now to the bath before anyone else wakes up in this house.

Gettin' Hammered!

An equation:

2 year old kicking me in the head because he had bad dreams and was moved to mom and dad's room

+law school husband who eats loud chips after midnight in an attempt to stay awake while reading

+a lovely cat who decides 3:30 A.M. is a good time for barfing all over the house

=my life

On my run today I tried half a pack of raspberry flavored Hammer Gel which lists "Long Chained Maltodextrin" as its top ingredient. Was it good? No. Did hit help me run longer or harder? No. Actually, I had to stop to drink it and then walked to the nearest water fountain for further hydration. A 6.5 mile day, all told.

The shirts arrived to me printed and ready for wear. They are so beautiful and perfect.

t.

Really MTV? Really?

So there's a wizard over at MTV that decided to play the following three videos in immediate succession this morning, as soon as I stepped on the treadmill at the gym:

Sky Ferreria's "17"
Jay-Z's "Forever Young"
Florence and the Machine's "Dog Days Are Over"

Say wha'?! Needless to say, all thoughts, as always, were with and of Lauryn.

the birds head is stuck!

It is sometimes impossible to get a good run in. I am finding more and more things lately that hinder my training!


So I just get warmed up running a nice wooded trail near my house that even has a nice scenic reserve with a boardwalk! With wonderful smelling lillies of the valley in the breeze....when I get the call (Mariah) "Mom one of the birds is stuck under the computer desk!" Me "why is the bird out??!" Riah "I let it out on accident! Mom! It's head is stuck and I am scared (with heavy sobs). So much for this run!
The bird was safe and unstuck by the time I made it home. Mariah on the other hand was not!


Oh yeah quick note, we got two parakeets that Sidney fell in love with at one of Addisons friends houses and they gave them to us. I have to find the supply of crazy pills that the kids keep slipping me.

Going to try again today....

5 Month Marker

Today marks the 5 month anniversary of Lauryn, Steven, and Shanna's passing. The longest months I've lived. And it's heartbreaking. And every time I have to explain this accident--have to explain the loss of my sister to someone who hasn't yet heard--I'm so hurt. And I try to live each day with her memory and spirit in my movements and thoughts because the alternative is that I let the grief crush me. And it may. It still may. Because it isn't fair that I have to live the rest of my life without my little sister. It isn't fair that I don't get to talk to her and watch her graduate from high school and get to go shopping with her for all that stupid college stuff that Target and Bed, Bath, & Beyond put on lists of "Dorm Room Essentials" and I don't get to lecture her about the perils of underage drinking and what douches college aged guys can be ('tis true). And I'm so very sad that she is gone.